Now, to be fair, I have nothing against people who choose to have kids. What I do have a problem with, is people who for some reason always want to tell everyone around them how wonderful it is to have children and that “everybody should have kids!”. Those kinds of people start asking nonsensical questions when you tell them you don’t want kids at all and try to convince you that you are wrong. They find all kinds of justifications for their little bundle of slime and poo.
If you are just a person who has kids and likes having kids with no additional fuss, I respect you. But if you are one of those who would ask me “But whyyyyy don’t you want kids? Kids are so great, you should have them!“… or if you are one of those who blabber about various justifications and rationalizations for having kids… then you need to read on, since you fall into that category of annoying people.
- Argument: “It is selfish to live for yourself without raising a child”
Response: that is one of the biggest hypocrisies I have ever heard. On the contrary, having a child is one of the most selfish things a person can do. Why? Because no one needs your kid except yourself. You are raising it just for you and not for “the good of the nation”. You are raising it driven by your narcisistic illusion that the world needs another copy of this wonderful flower that is you. If you were truly not selfish, then you would invest your time and energy into educating and bringing up large groups of young children (for example as a teacher) and not concentrate solely on your own kid. Now you’re just contributing to already huge problem of overpopulation in the world and not doing anyone any favors.
- Argument: “It is a very grown-up thing to do to and shows your maturity”
Response: are you aware that even asocial alcoholics and drug addicts have kids and raise them? Are you aware that a lot of teenagers (in certain places in the world) have kids? Does that show their maturity?.. Does it require some special skills from them? No. Even more importantly, kids of a drug addict or an alcoholic sometimes turn out totally fine and become respectable people, while children of a high-class white-collar worker sometimes turn out to be murderers, psychopaths and maniacs. So don’t flatter yourself too much, because merely having kids don’t automatically make you any better than a common alcoholic or a teenager with unexpected pregnancy.
- Argument: “My kids is my way of becoming immortal (a.k.a. I will live through my children)”
Response: ok, so you reduce yourself to mere DNA? Even then, less than half of your DNA is expressed in your children, making this belief about as valid as believing in homeopathic medicine. It is also very similar to religious people’s beliefs who think they can somehow “transcend” their mortal body and become immortal. You need to accept that your child is a completely separate and independent person, not just a copy of you. It is very selfish (and also dumb) to believe that you can continue living via another person.
- Argument: “My kids are my way of leaving a mark/making an impact in this world”
Response: huge majority, probably around 90-95% of the population will make absolutely zero impact on this world and will disappear completely without any marks whatsoever. Trusting your kid to be in that 5-10% minority who will make some kind of impact is really naive and also a huge pressure on a child.
- Argument: “It’s genetically programmed into us to have kids, thus it must be one true meaning of life”
Response: well, eating and shitting is also genetically programmed into us, so why not make that your life meaning? I mean, by this reasoning of yours the purpose and meaning of life should be taking a good shit, because this instinct manifests in people much earlier than the instinct to reproduce. It is also much more critical for a person to be able to poop than it is to reproduce. Have you ever seen a person who could survive without taking a shit? No. Meanwhile, a lot of people live long and happy lives without ever having kids. So which “genetically programmed instinct” is more important?.. I think the answer is obvious.
Also, do you realize that in this case the lowest earth worm has the same meaning of life as you, since that worm also has a genetic programming for reproducton? Any regular worm who isn’t even capable of conscious thought has same life’s purpose as you, a thinking person.
- Argument: “But who will pay your pension when you’re old if you have no kids?”
Response: your kids. With the issue of overpopulation being as huge as it is now, we wil never, I repeat, _never_ have a shortage of people on this Earth. Just as we can’t choose where our taxes go today, your kids will also have to contribute to my pension from their taxes regardless if they want it or not.
- Argument: “Humans would go extinct if everyone was like you!”
Response: are you kidding me? Current demographic explosion is so huge that problems caused by overpopulation are much bigger than underpopulation could ever cause. At this point it is absolutely inconcievable that humanity could go extinct just because not enough people have kids. If anything, you are just making problems worse by bringing another child into this already overcrowded world. And you dare to claim you are “saving humanity” by doing this? Ridiculous.
- Argument: “People like you who don’t want to have children will go extinct.”
Response: humans already went through millions of years of evolution, and yet I am still here today. Obviously, I didn’t go extinct, and if anything it seems in a modern world there are more and more people who don’t want kids. Apparently we’re not going anywhere, and not getting extinct.
- <…there will be more when I have time…>